Dominate the weather

Guess who America's new enemy is? Mother nature. Yikes, I'm shaking.

A weather check was in order to follow up on the plan to play catch at Lafayette Park. Turned to Weather Channel, where an argument was raging about U.S. satellites "defeating" global warming.

A new weather satellite wasn't needed to prove global warming, a cool-headed scientist said. A reduction in the Great Lakes' levels was enough to prove that, he said.

The political sluggo balked at the theory, following Bush administration's official line.

"Global warming isn't real. You guys said El Nino was real, but it wasn't." he boasted. Rather than theoretical garbage, new satellites would provide weather-tracking tools to help scientists make more accurate predictions, he said. He was clearly pointing the middle finger at the scientist.

New satellites will ensure "[Hurricane] Katrinas don't happen again," he continued. Satellites will be a solid weapon in "America's war" on weather as global environmental trends will become predictable. Satellites would help the U.S. "dominate the weather."

Before wunderkid suggested the sale of San Francisco to Canada because of Mother Nature's earthquake threats, common sense set in at Weather Channel. An anchor interrupted, giving the scientist the last word.

The scientist's cool-as-a-cucumber attitude hadn't waved. He said that global warming was real, and any new tool, no matter how dominant they were, couldn't combat Mother Nature.